ijustd0i:

My next will get so much of me.

I’ve been through so many relationships or potential relationships that ended with her choosing someone else. And I think about them all a lot more than I care to admit, but one prominent thought I do keep in mind is that I could love them so much better, and so much more than the guy they left me for.

And that’s no exaggeration. That’s not me overstating my abilities in a relationship. I honestly believe that I would have loved these girls so much more..

And it’s not like I plan to lose someone to another. It’s not as if I don’t know what’s in front of me when it is, indeed, in front of me. I appreciate them to the fullest and you can ask any one of my exes or any girl I’ve ever had genuine feelings for. When I make a girl a part of my life, I go out of my way to make sure she feels needed and appreciated.

So it’s a shame things like this happen.

But I promise, to both her and myself, that my next girl, the next female that I should have genuine, real feelings for will get not only all of my own love but the love that these past women passed up on. I’m talking drowning in affection. So much so that she will be scared to death by me.

Okay, not that far. Maybe.

But yes.. I just have so much to make up for. So much closeted affection that I never got to fully express. So my next, I will make sure it will be her dream relationship. I swear I will pour so much of myself into her. I will go to extremes to be perfect.

.. I just don’t want to lose someone again. It’s that bad.